West Cork Classic Retro
We're home...
Apologies for the delay in filing the story, as I was in Dublin
yesterday on a Mission Impossible (cue music). As you can guess from the
headline, we brought home some trophies. Big T & Ragworth were first in
class, with Sparkie & Camper were second in class. Also, Suggs was the
(very) unofficial "Landcruiser Challenge" winner as well as being the
photographer for the weekend.
Ragworth started on the psychological battle at scrutiny, with wrecking
everybody's heads with comments like "We'll be 300 points ahead on Saturday
night"; Outta way - Expert Navi coming through" etc. He also started to call
himself the "Semi-Works Navigator". I'd say though he got thick when I asked
was the name because he worked half the time......
We thought there would be war in the Big T/Ragworth camp, with Ragworth
constantly commenting on the weapon of choice for the weekend, with the car
being "Dirty, Smelly, Filty, Ill-prepared, etc". On Killmacalogue & Borlin,
the comments changed to "We're Dead!!!", the baby.......
The event also started poorly for the Sparkie/Camper camp, with an
unscheduled stop needed on Friday night to empty Camper's stomach. Sugg's
came to Camper's rescue with tablets which seemed to work wonders (no more
stomach emptying stops needed!). Saturday morning was going well, with
Sparkie/Camper had a buffer of 90 points built up.
Then, the results officer spotted an error, and when corrected, Sparkie/Camper
were over 150 points behind!. Over the rest of the event, Big T/Ragworth
managed to open the gap to over 200 points. In our defence, due to transport
issues (mechanical and a lack of road tax) Camper's road car was used by
Sparkie/Camper. The car had no proper trip meter, the car's speedo was in
kilometers and the front tyres were at the minimum threat depth, so an
up-hill battle was the result. The saving grace was that Sparkie was a demon
on the autotests, and beat Big T in most of the autotests (and managed to
break the Audi on the last test, Hee Hee!)
Speaking of Audi's, the Mikkola/Hertz combination was just Big T/Ragworth.
The Audi managed to survive, despite both Big T's & Sparkie's effort. The
saga of getting the trip meter working is worthy of Shakespeare. Thursday
night at half one in the morning we got it working despite my efforts to
sabotage it...
The event finished up on Sunday with a God Awful regularity with a trace
for route that took about three hours to figure out. And then the fun
started, with Ragworth really rubbing it in. He was told that if he didn't
put a smelly sock in it, we would publish his modelling photos. Sparkie, I
reckon, is looking at getting a car for retro's he loved it so much.
Camper's still attempting to get the mud off the Almera, and Big T's now
using the Audi everyday, and managed to get the spotlights focused on the
Monday night after the event.
And now for the photos. Suggs has loads of photos, including of the
prize-giving. I took only a few, so if anybody wants one, email
Photos@RedMistMotorsport.com
and I'll send the request on to Suggs. I've a few of my own
here. Below is a pic of the
whole gang, with the Chief Engineer - Cousin Brian

Update #2
Well, we've heard from a good source that the pink dress wearing
navigator is not all that pleased with the Audi. Somehow, he's seen not too
flattering photos of the car, and has ranted down the phone. He was making
some crazy demands about seating positions, in car entertainment options and
some other daft ideas. It was so bad at one stage, he had to put his mother
on the phone to make his arguments.
On the other hand, the preparation of the car is going well, with the
final touches to the wiring loom to be made and the experimental custom
light alloy spot light brackets to be mounted.
Also, there is bad news in the Toyota camp. It looks like the driver
won't make the start ramp, or more specifically, there was a scheduling
clash for the Saturday evening. An adequate replacement has been sourced,
but he took one look at the Toyota and said that he wouldn't be seen dead in
it, or something like that....
The good news in this camp however, is that adequate Peanut M&M's have
been sourced for the navi, and the 50kg should last until Sunday afternoon,
we hope.
We also have heard that there is a slim chance of a Works Peugeot entry
may be made at the last minute. Arrangements are being made now to put the
deal together....
Original Story
As you can guess from the sensationalist headline, we've heard that H.
Mikkola & A. Hertz are doing the West Cork Classic Retro this year in an
Audi. The car is currently undergoing secret preparation in deep West Cork
for the event, with the pre-event shakedown scheduled for the week after the
Rally of the Lakes. The shakedown testing could be interesting, given the
experimental nature of the quattro drivetrain
We can confirm that there is no truth in the rumour that the navi is
shopping for a pink dress, but we can confirm that the Swedish Chef will be
down providing catering for the team.
There are also rumours also floating about that there is a possibility
of an entry from C. Sainz & L. Moya in a Toyota. The Toyota that is being
lined up for them is currently sitting beside a Cow Shed in West Cork with
no brakes, but don't tell them...
There was also a possibility of another headline grabbing crew entering
in a 4 wheel drive Subaru, but when they found out that the car was a 13
year old 600cc 4WD Subaru Vivo, in snot green and that the car is used as
the "Farm Car" by Cousin Brian, they ran a mile.
Now, all that's left to do is to fill in the entry forms. Quick
question, how do you spell "Mikkola"?